Following up on yesterday’s blog, Be a Turtle, Take Baby Steps, I listed some of the ideas others had posted in reference to the question: “What do I do when I struggle with being reactive.”
- Practice makes better, not perfect.
- We all get triggered by certain people/situations at times. I find that the serenity prayer always helps.
- Each time something occurs and the inside of me starts boiling/pressure in my chest, heart beating fast, right at that moment I have choices: walk away or cool down.
- WAIT followed by deep breaths.
- Less is more when I am agitated or doubtful…I choose to pause.
- The key is knowing it is a process.
- Remember, the behavior didn’t show up in one day. It will not go away in one day.
- Being able to know at the end of the day I did my best. For there are no bad days. The days that are the most uncomfortable and uneasy, I call growing changing days!
- The only fair comparison to me, is me.
- You may want to try shifting this thought process from self-criticism to self-compassion. All these traits that no longer work for you once developed out of your attempts to survive at an earlier, more vulnerable period in your life.
- My character, thoughts, opinions, etc. are governed by a subconscious belief system that I unwittingly have in place. They are habitually reinforced. I found it possible to bring these into the light and by the same repetitive processes I could change these to healthier and more recovery based beliefs.
- A path through an unmapped wilderness takes time to establish, but the rewards are immeasurable.
- When I’m challenged with thoughts or actions in that direction, I recognize there are still aspects in a situation there to teach me something not entirely learned. They call it getting hooked by your story line. When you learn what hooks you and you come to understand why, you gain the freedom in the pause that arises to choose not biting the hook and being taken.
- Keep looking and listening. You will find your answer.
- Of course, it is possible, but only out of Love to ourselves. Not if we are critical. If you see the patterns and they are repeating, you already have an awareness. But if you judge, you’re back to the beginning. When you judge that you should have done or said something else, means you don’t accept the process and an old voice you still believe tells you, “you’re not enough” and “you’re basically wrong.”
- I like to use EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) to find out the root cause and detach from the trauma.
- If you know me, based on who I was a year ago, you don’t know me at all. My growth game is strong. Allow me to reintroduce myself.
- I have found using EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) helpful to reframe old messages from childhood trauma.
- AAA – Awareness. Accept. Adapt.
- I have found that while I might have great insight into my less flattering qualities, I can’t wrench the boulder out of the hole. I have to take the chisel and hammer to it.
The following video was my favorite response.
What happens when you set up a bike to work exactly opposite than how it’s supposed to work? When you turn left, the wheel goes right and when you turn right, the wheel goes left.
Can we learn to ride a backwards bicycle?
Watch the video to find out…
The Backwards Brain Bicycle – Smarter Every Day
I wish all my Fledglings the best of luck on managing their internal and personal struggles. Feel free to use this site as a support network for whatever you need.
Stick with the fruits of your labor. Someday you will be awarded with a bountiful harvest.