(started March 29, 2017)


Last night I treated myself to Star Wars: The Last Jedi. I absolutely loved it! Familiar people, complex plot, merged with new characters and heroes (the porgs are adorable!). There was a lot of action with a dash of humor.


And, of course, a ton of awesome flying scenes. My favorite!


I have to admit though, and please no judgement; I was never a fan of Star Wars.


I know. I know. Sacrilegious.


I mean, I’ve always been a huge fan of The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings. I have followed all of Terry Brooks’ Shannara series. Science fiction, fantasy, action, and thrillers have been the primary books and movies I tend to gravitate to.


For some reason, Star Wars never held my interest.


That was until this past March…



Left Brain vs. Right Brain

In March, I had watched a Ted Talk by Jill Bolte Taylor where she explains what it was like to have a stroke, a hemorrhage in the left hemisphere of her brain. As a brain scientist, she enlightens us by teaching the difference between the left hemisphere, where logical thought occurs, and the right hemisphere, where creative thought transpires.


During her stroke, when her logical thought processes went off line, she explains how she experienced ultimate bliss.


I was really intrigued with her story so I read her book, My Stroke of Insight. She not only goes more in depth about her stroke, but explains the preparation and dangerous surgery that she undertook to remove the blood clot in her brain and her eight-year recovery process to relearn everything she was ever taught.


There was one part in her story that made me think of Star Wars.


As Jill was recovering, she realized that we have a choice. We can either stay stuck in the critical and judgmental left side of our brains or we can learn to step away from the left side by tapping into the intuitive and creative right side.


We have a choice which side of our brain we make more dominate.


We have a choice to which side of our brain we make more dominate. Share on X


This was when I came up with the phrase, “Just say No! to the left side.” It was a way for me to get out of my analytical brain, to stop Fighting the Tiger, to stop the Hamster from Sprinting, and to stop Fighting the Current.


If I could learn to stop being tempted by my own negative, judgmental thoughts that brought me down, I could find peace.


Then I thought about Star Wars.


Wasn’t there a quote that said, “Luke stay away from the Darker Side and if you start to go astray let The Force be your guide? Oh my Yoda. Yo, yo, yo, yo, Yoda.”


Ok, that was a song, but you know what I mean.


Could the Dark Side of the force be analogous to the left hemisphere of the brain and could the Light Side be the right hemisphere?


For the first time, I was interested in finding out if there was more to Star Wars than just a “space movie”.



Vibrational Energy

Jill Bolte Taylor wrote:

“My entire self-concept shifted as I no longer perceived myself as a single, a solid, an entity with boundaries that separated me from the entities around me…clearly, we are trillions upon trillions of particles in soft vibration. We exist as fluid-filled sacs in a fluid world where everything exists in motion. Different entities are composed of different densities of molecules but ultimately every pixel is made up of electrons, protons, and neutrons performing a delicate dance. Every pixel, including every iota of you and me, and every pixel of space seemingly in between, is atomic matter and energy…”


Not only do we react to what we see, hear, touch, etc., but our brains are constantly reacting to the different energy fields around us. This explains how we intuitively know the emotional energy of someone when they walk in the door; we can sense their vibrational energy around them.


Jill learned that we have a choice on how we handle that energy and the emotions that bombard us. It takes 90 seconds for an emotion to dissipate.


Anything that lasts longer than 90 seconds is a conscious choice.


Emotions dissipate in 90 seconds. Any thought that lasts longer than 90 seconds is conscious choice. Share on X


We make the choice to hook into those emotional and psychological loops. We can step to the left and stay in our heads and continue to create chaos, or, we can step to the right and experience joy.



Consciousness Creates Reality

Pam Grout explains in E-Squared that physicists now believe that consciousness creates reality.


Physicists now believe that consciousness creates reality. Share on X


I researched this information and found this article.


Which lead me to this video about the Quantum Double Slit Experiment. Very interesting and extremely confusing. Just when we thought we knew how the world worked. This five minute video will blow your mind!



Scientists are baffled trying to explain what’s going on. What they’ve learned from this experiment is that “the observer creates reality.” What ever the observe believes will happen, actually does happen.


“An infinite mystery is The Force. The more we learn, the more we discover we do not know.




Star Wars and The Force

For those Star Wars enthusiasts out there, please forgive me for not being aware of this before. I’ll admit, I’m feeling humility right now.


Taking in all I’ve learned this past year and a half, there’s a depth to Star Wars that I had never realized.


The Field of Potentiality that Pam talks about is The Force.


That vibrational energy that Jill explained in her book is The Force.


“Like a river, The Force flows through you.”



The left side of the brain is the Dark Side. And the right side is the Light.


It’s like Ying and Yang. You can’t have one without the other. And you need both to be in balance.


“Hear one side and you will be in the dark. Hear both and all will be clear.”

-Lord Chesterfield


The Force is real. Scientists are proving that The Secret is spot-on. Our consciousness creates reality.


Our internal struggle that we have within ourselves IS the struggle between the Dark and the Light.


The Dark Side gets its power from our darker emotions such as fear, grief, despair, jealousy, greed, anger, and hatred.


This reminded me of Yoda’s quote about fear.


“Fear is the path to the Dark Side.

Fear leads to anger.

Anger leads to hate.

Hate leads to suffering.”


The Sith were major practitioners of the Dark Side of The Force, whereas the Jedi, followed the Light. The Jedi were taught that the Dark was considered seductive and they had to maintain vigilance to avoid falling victim to the irresistible pull that the Dark Side has within all of us.


Sound familiar?


Addiction, negative self-talk, and the constant loops we get into in our heads versus learning how to love oneself, manage emotions, and still the mind so we don’t react when confronted with triggers.


Yoda had said that the Dark Side of The Force is not stronger than the Light Side, merely “quicker, easier, and more seductive.”


For a deeper understanding about The Force, click here.



Star Wars and the Rise of Phoenix

I was once tempted by the Dark Side and was unable to resist that temptation.

“To succumb to the Dark Side is human. To never be tempted is not.”



Once I had allowed myself to move to the Dark Side, it was difficult for me to let go of the guilt and shame that kept me chained to my past actions.

“You must unlearn what you have learned”


Star Wars V: The Empire Strikes back



I not only had to stop medicating with addiction, I had to unlearn my automatic reactions to managing my emotions and my life. I had to face my fears.

“Named must you fear be, before banish it you can.”


Star Wars V: The Empire Strikes Back



What was my biggest fear? The fear that I was a burden, unimportant, and not worthy. The fear that whoever I love will leave me. The fear of being alone. The fear of loss.

“The fear of loss is a path to the Dark Side.”


Star Wars III: Revenge of the Sith



I struggled with my fears, and yet, I could never seem to get rid of them.

“When you look at the Dark Side, careful you must be…for the Dark Side looks back.”


Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith



I continued to create what I believed.

“Be mindful of your thoughts Anakin. They’ll betray you.”


Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones



Through my separation, moving out, and my divorce, I was lost. My world was thrown upside down. Everything I believed had come true and the future I saw was nothing more than just a wall of fog.

“The Dark Side clouds everything. Impossible to see the Light, the future is.”




I felt the force of the Dark Side pulling me towards it, feeding my fear and my anger.

“Anger, fear, aggression…the Dark Side are they. Once you start down the dark path, forever it will dominate your destiny, consume you it will. Easily they flow, quick to join you in a fight.”


Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith



Pain was nothing I had ever experienced before. It tore through me to the core. Hate and anger consumed me.

“I sense great fear in you, Skywalker. You have hate. You have anger. But you don’t use them.”

-Count Dooku

Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith



I was so deeply angry. Angry at my former spouse. Angry at the world. Angry at God. But most of all, I was angry at me!

Strike me down in anger, and I will always be with you.

-Luke Skywalker

Star Wars VIII: The Last Jedi



Even though I was sober from my addiction, I still remained in the Dark Side. I was furious with myself, hating who I was and who I had become.

“…hate leads to suffering.”


Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace



I could feel myself being shredded from the inside. I wanted my pain to stop. I was hurting the people I loved. I needed to change.

“Hmm…In the end, cowards are those who follow the Dark Side.”


Star Wars: The Clone Wars (TV series)



How could I change? How could I move on?

“Control, control. You must learn control.”


Star Wars V: The Empire Strikes Back



But I’m powerless to my addiction. My addiction is something I cannot control.

“Try not… Do. Or do not… There is no try.”


Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back



This had nothing to do with sobriety. I was already sober for six years. I needed to DO more to heal myself. I needed to learn to let go.

“Train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose.”


Star Wars III: Revenge of the Sith



I had to change my point of view.

“Many of the truths that we cling to depend on our point of view.”


Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith



I needed to move out of the Dark and shift into the Light.

“The belonging you seek is not behind you…it is ahead. I am no Jedi, but I know the force. It moves through and surrounds every living thing. Close your eyes… Feel it… The Light… It’s always been there. It will guide you.”

-Maz Kanata

Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens



I needed to make peace with my past.

“Let the past die. Kill it, if you have to. That’s the only way to become what you are meant to be.”

-Kylo Ren

Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi



I needed to not let the Dark Side of my past define who I am today. I have made mistakes. That is not who I am nor who I want to be.

“The greatest teacher, Failure is.”


Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi



I needed to constantly remind myself that I create that which I believe. If I’m constantly thinking about my problems, my weaknesses, and my worries, then I’m giving them more power.

“Remember: Your focus determines your reality.”

-Qui-Gon Jinn

Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace



I needed to resist the temptation and negative thoughts of the Dark Side. I must join the resistance and fight.

“This is how we’re gonna win. Not fighting what we hate, saving what we love.”


Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi



I have seen both the pain and suffering of the Dark Side. I have felt the serenity and peace of the Light. The Dark will always be there to tempt us and to remind us that part of being human means we are always capable of evil. Knowledge is power and we need to wield it wisely.

“You will know (the good and the bad) when you are calm, at peace. Passive. A Jedi uses the Force for knowledge and defense, never for attack.”


Star Wars III: Revenge of the Sith


We all have a choice.



“To be a Jedi is to face the truth, and choose. Give off light, or darkness, Padawan. Be a candle, or the night.”

~ Yoda


I chose to be a candle. I chose to rise from the ashes and become reborn. I chose to be a Phoenix.



What Do You Choose?

In every Star Wars movie, there’s a Jedi Master. This is the teacher of either the Dark or the Light.


Addicts have sponsors.


We also have our friends, therapists, gurus, life coaches, pastors, teachers, elders, etc.

“Always pass on what you have learned”


Star Wars Episode III: The Revenge of the Sith



I love what Luke Skywalker had to say about the responsibility of mentors, one parents can relate to.

We are what they grow beyond. That is the true burden of all masters.”

-Luke Skywalker

Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi



When we rise up from the pain from our struggles, we too will become masters for those who follow us.


For fun, push play as you read my final thoughts.




PS: I Just Have To

I couldn’t talk about Star Wars without including two of my favorite Weird Al songs and his famous concert encore.



-Weird Al



The Saga Begins

-Weird Al


The Saga Begins and Yoda

-Weird Al Live Finale


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