I’m grateful for the flu this week. It’s easy to go through life not realizing how much we have when it comes to our health, and when the floor drops beneath us, being bed ridden and weak for two days gives us a newfound appreciation for what we’ve had. In addition, I had to cancel numerous plans and ask my ex to care for our girls while I recovered. Such an overwhelming amount of guilt and shame came over me for not meeting those obligations, that I realized it was my inner child fearing the judgment of others, letting people down, and not doing everything perfectly. I’m grateful that this is yet another piece I still have yet to look into as I do deeper work on myself.
I’m grateful for flying with a standards check airman. These are the instructors at an airline that know the manuals and procedures inside and out. And while I find that I can be overly anxious trying to be perfect, not screw up, and be impressive, I also realize that in doing so I tend to make more mistakes than when I’m relaxed and calm. I’m grateful for the challenge I had managing my emotions and am truly grateful that by doing so, I was able to open myself to learning some new things. I had a wealth of knowledge at my fingertips for three days and I’m grateful I was able to turn an uncomfortable working environment to a positive, training one.
I’m grateful for my roommate’s little boy, who also came down with the flu, but was so resilient that he could still find the fun and joy in life, smiling and laughing, even though you could tell he totally felt like crap. It gives me hope that we can turn around any of our mindsets when given the chance.