Archive for category: Marriage

Happy New Year my Fledglings. Actually, it’s really Happy New Decade. Can you believe I haven’t written for a whole decade?

 

I can see the eye rolling response I’d get from my two teen daughters right now who aren’t as appreciative of “Dad jokes” as I am.

 

Seriously, I can’t believe it’s been three years since I wrote my first blog January 9, 2017. I’ve come such a long way from that first piece where my energy was focused on “if, through this blog, I can save just one marriage…”

 

I’ve had over 9 years in recovery and have done an inordinate amount of personal work. A little over five years ago my ex asked for separation. A year later she asked for divorce and another six months before we filed the divorce with the courts. This was followed by another three and a half years before the final papers were signed, just two months ago.

 

Our divorce will be finalized sometime this month (maybe it already has been) when we receive the stamped “judgment” in the mail.

 

May 1^st, 2018 I wrote a blog titled “It’s Time” where I thought I had stopped fighting the current. My therapist repeated to me a couple of weeks ago what he’s been telling me for years.

 

“What I love about the universe, is that it will continue to repeat itself until you’re ready to listen.”

 

I listened alright. Just like a child listens to their parent. “Yeah, yeah. I hear you.”

 

I’d internalize what I heard for a few days, maybe a week or two, then back to old habits I’d go, only to once again be reminded that my actions showed I still did not get it.

Read more