This was one crazy, wild, and fun week! It was the ending of an era; 18 years of moving from one airline for the next destination at another. Sadness as I leave a piece of my heart behind and move away from many coworkers who are family to me. Yet excitement at the prospects that lie ahead and the new family I’m joining. I pray that my schedule will finally open up so I no longer have to commute and will spend the time in my own bed that I used to spend out on the road. I pray I will have the time with my family I have longed to have.

 

This week has been a hurricane of emotions; love, happiness, loss, grief, excitement, and fear. A lot to process. I’m grateful that my journey of recovery has allowed me the ability to stay present with it all.

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I’m grateful for my last trip training a captain upgrade. I’m glad we were able to get his required observation flight accomplished so I could sign him off at the end of the trip. I’m grateful that we had a four day trip with many long legs so I could pass on a wealth of information and give him the ability to learn as much as possible from me.

 

I’m grateful for the blowup my older daughter had when I came home. I know one may ask, why would you be grateful for that kind of stress? I’m grateful because it forced the four of us to sit down and talk. It allowed frustrations and anger to come to the surface. My wife was able to ask “how can we make this better for all of us?” and “what can we do to make it easier for us?” questions which helped empower our girls and open the door to looking at some of our own issues. Lot’s of repressed thoughts and emotions came out that we were able to put on the table and process.

 

I’m grateful for the one on one time I got to spend with my younger daughter watching Riverdale and The Haunting of Hill House. I truly enjoy the time we spend connecting and I have missed her snuggled up in my arms. My little girl doesn’t like to do that as much as she used to, so I cherish anytime she allows herself to be vulnerable with me.

I’m grateful to have had three overnights in my home town this past week. It’s one thing to leave the day before a trip, fly for four days, then commute home the next day. It’s another when three of the nights I get paid to sleep in my own bed! No hotels. Leave in the morning and come back in the afternoon. Time with friends. Time with family. Time getting household chores and errands done without having to wait a week to do them. It’s kind of like a real job. WOW!

 

I’m grateful for the beautiful weather so I could hand fly in and out of the airport I instructed at over 19 years ago. I’m grateful I was able to fly the traffic pattern, not once, but three times, reminding me what it used to be like doing touch and go’s the entire day. I’m grateful there’s still one tower controller who had first started when I was teaching, adding to the camaraderie and comfortableness of us bantering back and forth over the radio frequency.

 

I’m grateful for dinner and lunch with good friends. I’m grateful for vulnerable phone conversations. I’m grateful my peers in program and my friends take the time and effort to be there for me when needed. I’m grateful for their insight, their support, and their love.

 

I’m grateful for a short two-day trip flown with the flight attendant who I’ve been crashing at her place for the past six years. I’m grateful for her friendship, her love, and her support. I’m grateful for the second home she provided when I was away from mine, the crews that have stayed there, the incredible meals she has both cooked and the popular martini parties she is know for.

 

I’m grateful I was able to meet a former first officer’s baby girl. She’s adorable. What a beautiful family they have!

 

I’m grateful for the time I’ve had the past couple of months to maintain my exercise routine, eat mindfully and healthily, and the time I’ve had to prepare for training coming up soon. Life has definitely been busy, yet it’s been incredibly full and rewarding.