Happy New Year my Fledglings. Actually, it’s really Happy New Decade. Can you believe I haven’t written for a whole decade?

 

I can see the eye rolling response I’d get from my two teen daughters right now who aren’t as appreciative of “Dad jokes” as I am.

 

Seriously, I can’t believe it’s been three years since I wrote my first blog January 9, 2017. I’ve come such a long way from that first piece where my energy was focused on “if, through this blog, I can save just one marriage…”

 

I’ve had over 9 years in recovery and have done an inordinate amount of personal work. A little over five years ago my ex asked for separation. A year later she asked for divorce and another six months before we filed the divorce with the courts. This was followed by another three and a half years before the final papers were signed, just two months ago.

 

Our divorce will be finalized sometime this month (maybe it already has been) when we receive the stamped “judgment” in the mail.

 

May 1st, 2018 I wrote a blog titled “It’s Time” where I thought I had stopped fighting the current. My therapist repeated to me a couple of weeks ago what he’s been telling me for years.

 

“What I love about the universe, is that it will continue to repeat itself until you’re ready to listen.”

 

I listened alright. Just like a child listens to their parent. “Yeah, yeah. I hear you.”

 

I’d internalize what I heard for a few days, maybe a week or two, then back to old habits I’d go, only to once again be reminded that my actions showed I still did not get it.

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Hello my Fledglings!

 

It’s been quite a long time since I’ve sat down and blogged. I feel some guilt that I haven’t kept up on my writing. My blog has been a way for me to process what’s going on in my life; a way to take me out of my story, instead of sitting in it.

 

Old habits die hard and through all the changes and loss these past 12 months, I’ve sat in my story for much too long.

 

Five years ago, my wife asked for separation. Four years ago, she asked for divorce. After all this time and energy, we will be signing papers tomorrow.

 

It’s time to become the observer and process what’s been going on so I can, once again, Rise from the Ashes.

 

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