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Treatment for Partners of Sex Addicts

In the last few blogs I’ve hopefully enlightened my Fledglings how partners of sex addicts have symptoms similar to people with PTSD.


We started our journey first in Understanding PTSD where I defined PTSD, listed symptoms of PTSD, educated how PTSD relates to ACOA (Adult Children of Alcoholics) and presented different kinds of treatment for PTSD.


In Sex Addiction Induced Trauma, I explained the thirteen different dimensions that were developed by Dr. Omar Minwalla specifically to understand the different types of trauma that partners of sex addicts suffer from. And in More Trauma in Partners of Sex Addicts, I talked about the key points that Barbara Steffens co-wrote in her book The Sexually Addicted Spouse.


It’s important to remember, that treatment for the partner is just as important as treatment for the addict. The following blog will focus on that treatment.

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More About Trauma in Partners of Sex Addicts

I’m finding that the desire to continue to learn more about the trauma I caused in my marriage is fading. I feel burned out. I feel beaten and whipped. I want to take a break. I know that’s avoidance, me evading what I need to do.


If I take a break, will I even want to come back to this?


Probably not.


I know I need to continue. Not just for myself, but for my Fledglings. I want all of you to have the information and knowledge I didn’t fully understand at the beginning. I want us all to rise from the ashes.


We can only get there by walking through the fire.


Are you ready to die so you can be reborn?

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Sex Addiction Induced Trauma: How Sex Addiction Impacts the Partners

My journey of recovery from sex addiction has finally led me to look at the trauma piece I caused my former spouse. I must admit, I feel a little bit of guilt that I’m trying to understand this now, when I have almost seven years of recovery under my belt. I may have maintained sobriety, but my behaviors in recovery were far from being free from my character defects. I didn’t make her life easy.


“Seriously Rafiki, why did it take me so long?”


“Phoenix, it’s progress not perfection,” Rafiki reminds me. “It’s one day at a time. You weren’t ready to see. You needed to heal your own wounding to be present for your former spouse.”


“I caused this! All I did was cause her more trauma by not being present. I should have been there for her a long time ago.”


“When you ‘should yourself’, you just shit on yourself,” Rafiki declares.


“Yeah, I know,” I groan.

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