Tomorrow will be one year since I packed my truck and moved away from my family.
I still feel pain when I think about that day. Although the pain is remote, lingering in the background, it’s still there.
A year ago, I felt crippled. The pain circulated through every cell in my body. Emotionally, I felt as if I was in a tornado, spinning around and around. No matter how hard I tried, I could not stop the feeling that I was spiraling out of control. Two months later I kept complaining to Rafiki, I needed to stop the physical pain I felt in my body!
I felt alone. I felt insane. I couldn’t purge the feelings that radiated through me.
My abandonment wound was triggered and I couldn’t stop the bleeding. In fact, keeping with that analogy, instead of putting pressure on the wound to stop the bleeding, I kept cutting myself in other parts of my body. I felt as if I was going to die.